Who is the Notorious BPG?

I'm Anna. Pronounced Ahhhhnah.

I am an American woman. With a naturalized citizen, born German Father and an American-born and raised Mother.

I have a Master’s Degree in Clinical-Counseling Psychology from LaSalle University with an emphasis in grief and loss, pastoral counseling/religion and human sexuality. Before that, I got my Bachelor’s degree in Psychology and Women’s Studies from East Stroudsburg University, and am a proud high school graduate of Easton Area High School (Go Red Rovers!).

I’m a Fur Momma only and that is okay.

But in the end, I’m just a girl with some ideas who appears to be foolish enough to try to make them realities.

I’m flawed in lots of ways.

However, I’m also fabulous at the same time and I work hard and learn a lot along life’s journey. Life is a work in progress and I embody that and I am proud of it.

I’m a dancer, an amateur cook, a lover, a teacher, a music buff, a film fanatic, a pop-culture vulture, an existentialist, a dreamer and I tend to be funny at times. I also tend to think too deeply and overthink often. I work daily towards not letting things like depression and anxiety keep me from the path I’m supposed to be traveling in this life.

I believe in the good in others, and probably always will…which has caused me a fair deal of heartache. I’m not easy to understand, I struggle with fears of abandonment and have big time trust issues; and I overextend myself frequently. My heart is in the right place at all times whether that is accepted or not. In the end all the times I’ve risked were worth it when I found those who were worth the risk.

Credits:

Photograph by SoaringOak Photography.

Comments

Abandonment, Fear and Thanks

I woke up today very early. My significant other and I have a young puppy so that's part of the life at this time. Disturbed sleep. I woke up and just thought well, it's Thanksgiving, let's just be thankful today. I was in a good frame of mind. I had made the decision to just be present today as much as possible. But...in the wee small hours of the morning my always present depression and anxiety had other plans. I went to message a friend of mine. I connect a lot on Facebook so I went into messenger to just let her know I was thinking about her and I couldn't find her. At first I didn't worry, I figured that she and I were both struggling with the election stress and maybe she just went dark for a bit. I get that. I understand taking the mental health break if need be. Alas, she didn't just go dark. Upon investigation I came to understand that I had a friend in real life that I care about deeply. I would try hard to check on her and send Erik over with various...

Why Do Adults Ghost Each Other?

I'm not sure I understand why we do this to each other...as adults. In so many ways, it feels like we are just grown ups who never outgrew high school. I have been jealous of others and that jealousy has lead me at times to make moves to guard my own heart because I definitely have fomo (fear of missing out), anxiety, depression, abandonment issues and the feeling that no matter what I do, I will NEVER ever be good enough and in full honesty, I have been guilty of blocking people who have hurt me and people involved in certain things that trigger me because at times I have to look at certain parts of my life like they were addictions or toxic relationships. I have to accept that no matter what, there are going to be a large and sometimes very visible/vocal group of people who rather than work through things with me person to person and come to an understanding or workable position would rather just make me out to be a bad person. Maybe I'm delusional thinking that I'm act...

What I DIDN'T Set Out to Do with My Life: Polarize

If you've read any of my blog posts or have been through my dips in depression via my Facebook feed, you'll know that I think a LOT about what other people think. I'm trying hard to reverse that tendency but honestly the deprogramming to want to be liked by everyone (or most people); is a harder knot to unravel than I had previously thought. In many ways, I believe I have what is called a polarizing personality. It wasn't something I intended in any way, shape or form to have but as I do an inventory of my life and relationships I find that either people like me a lot or basically just hate me or want nothing really to do with me. I suppose I have a large brushstroke of people who are lukewarm but I have come over the years to realize that the toxic traits in myself that I continue to work towards uncovering or better yet evolving past really do tend to alienate people that I once honestly would have gone the distance for. I think it's my tendency to over commit the...

THE AMUSED LIFE BLOG

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